Perfect and Encouraging

You are so encouraging. I don't know how you stand me, when I find myself so annoying sometimes. I don't know how you're so patient with me when I come complaining to you so often. I am so needy, and you just take it all in stride. I'm beginning to see, more and more, that while you're not perfect, you're perfect for me.

Best Alarm Clock

This morning I was suddenly wide awake. I had remembered in my sleep that I had forgotten to do something that had to be checked by 7:00 this morning. But I looked at my clock and it said 7:40... I had missed the deadline. It wasn't a super important thing, just check some songs for Sunday and figure out if I needed to change any of them, but I still had wanted to make sure... I laid back down, disappointed that I had missed the deadline, disappointed I had forgotten to do it last night. But comforting myself that I am a good pianist. Suddenly, as I was laying there trying to fall back to sleep, I remembered that my clock was still an hour ahead! It was only 6:40! I lay there for a few moments longer, deciding if it was worth leaving my cozy nest. I believe, however, that God woke me up. Thankfully I did not need to change any of the songs, but if I had I would have been super stressed for missing the time given me for changing it. And I am very grateful God woke me up.

Pressure and Patience

You tell me you're 85% sure

I try so hard to be patient

I don't want you to feel pressured

School is most important right now

I keep saying

But I'm glad you disagree

I want to see you

But I will never tell you 'you have to come home'

If only your university was closer

I just wish we knew if you were able to come home

This weekend will drag

If you're not here

But I will do my best to be patient

To wait to find out

To not pressure you

Busy and Not

I feel like my life is so busy.

But half the reason is 

because

I 

get 

distracted.

The Difference of a Week

It's amazing how different one piano lesson can be to the next.

Last week felt like twice as long as it was.

Yesterday's lesson felt like half as long as it was, and by the time the hour and a half were up we'd only studied one song. 

Hopefully it means good things for practicing this week.

Spider In My Bed

Preparing my bed

Transforming it into a cozy nest

Move the blankets.

A spider.

A big fast spider.

In my bed.

There is no safe place

My safe haven, 

The place I hide from my fears, my nightmares

Has been intruded.

Remembrance Day

My family (minus my sister, who had to work) went down to the cenotaph today to remember and honour our nation's veterans, and those who risk their lives for us every day. Afterwards we pinned our poppies to a wrath dedicated to Canada's war veterans.

Lest we forget.

Thank you.

Hold My Hand

Hold my hand. 

Please.

Make it warm.

You are sweet.

Tease.

Hold me tight. 

Don't let go.

Another week apart.

Going Through My Head

The chorus going through my head:

I miss you

I miss you

I miss you

Whenever I think of you

Grey

Grey, cloudy sky

Grey, barren trees

Fallen, rotting leaves

Cold, damp air

Gloomy, sad thoughts

November 

I.O.S. - Information Overload Syndrome

My piano lesson today felt like it was hours, instead of only an hour and a half. I'm not sure why, completely, but I think it was because we covered so much material in that time slot. I think it was also partly because I've been feeling rather down lately, and being reminded of all the ways I'm playing wrong, and all the things I should know and don't, from being taught by a different teacher, is a little overwhelming. It is so hard to remember everything that is normally taught more slowly to beginner pianists. But I know I can do this. I will. And I'll be a better teacher and pianist because of it.

Missing You

This week is so long

So slow

And I miss you so

The minutes drag by

It is only Tuesday

I want to see you

I want you to hold me close and whisper in my ear that you missed me

I want to hold your hand, and not let go

I miss you

Downton Abbey

The BBC TV series Downton Abbey is positively addicting. I watched five episodes today... So anxious for the next episode to come out, but that won't be until Sunday, I think... argh! There are, I must admit, some storylines that are just getting old. Edith, the Dowager verses Mrs. Crowley. But hopefully they will be improved, if not by the end of this season, during next season.